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Well, then you’ve come to the right place! Yes, I know that this story is about scattering the ashes of a loved one. While that may be a sad time for most people, it ended up as a hilarious story for Mitch Feltscheer.
I know that it sounds quite disrespectful but trust me, you’ll be clutching your sides by the end of it so scroll on below and take a look at the Feltscheer family trying to scatter grandma in a windy sea.
And it ended as best as you would expect.
Source: Twitter
The hardest I've ever laughed in my entire life was a few years ago at my grandma's ashes scattering ceremony. A Thread:
— Mitch Feltscheer (@mitchfel) May 29, 2018
So a year to the day after her funeral the extended Feltscheer family gathered at her favourite spot in the world, with the idea being every one would take some of grandma's ashes and find a place to have a private moment of reflection and scatter her.
— Mitch Feltscheer (@mitchfel) May 29, 2018
Or as my dad (who was inexplicably in charge of proceedings) described it "everyone grabs a placcy cup and a scoop of grandma and you can go chuck her wherever you want".
— Mitch Feltscheer (@mitchfel) May 29, 2018
Grandma's favourite spot by the way, was a clearing atop a headland overlooking beachside cliffs and like literally every other day ever, it was insanely windy up there.
— Mitch Feltscheer (@mitchfel) May 29, 2018
I'm talking borderline cyclonic, like, you couldn't even crack open her urn without a bit of grandma escaping and flitting straight into the nearest cousin's face.
— Mitch Feltscheer (@mitchfel) May 29, 2018
A new plan was quickly hatched. We'd somehow traverse the cliff face to get down to sea level where it would hopefully be less windy and dad would wade out a few metres and scatter her in the water as we'd watch. Easy.
— Mitch Feltscheer (@mitchfel) May 29, 2018
After the task of getting a couple of 50 year-old aunties in heels down a steep path (fun!), we gathered in the winter sun and Dad hitched up his pants and awkwardly hobbled out into the sea.
— Mitch Feltscheer (@mitchfel) May 29, 2018
Despite the setbacks so far, at this point it was looking like we'd actually salvaged the whole event and we held eachother and looked on as dad yelled back "HERE WE GO!" opening the urn to a sudden explosive gust of wind, ejecting grandma into the air like a firework.
— Mitch Feltscheer (@mitchfel) May 29, 2018
At this point my brothers and I are holding in laughter at the absolute scene going down in front of us when suddenly the unmistakeable sound of a jetski rounds the headland and two 20-somethings come gunning straight for where grandma is falling into the sea.
— Mitch Feltscheer (@mitchfel) May 29, 2018
They don't just churn through grandmas ashes, they literally chuck a hard turn right in the middle of her, shooting grandma-soup up into the air. I'm pretty sure an aunty literally clutched her pearls.
— Mitch Feltscheer (@mitchfel) May 29, 2018
My brothers and I are in physical agony trying not to laugh at this point, as dad comes ambling back to the shore to a dozen or so silent Feltscheers trying to comprehend what just happened.
— Mitch Feltscheer (@mitchfel) May 29, 2018
Dad pauses and turns back to the sea. He puts his hands on his hips and with an utterly straight face sighs melancholically and says "Well. She always loved jetskis".
— Mitch Feltscheer (@mitchfel) May 29, 2018
And thats how I ended up sprawled on the sand on a Sunday morning, clutching my sides laughing as my dead grandma's ashes get churned out the back of a jetski. FIN.
— Mitch Feltscheer (@mitchfel) May 29, 2018
What did you think of this hilarious story? Have you ever been to a funeral where you laughed? Comment down below and let us know.
