Woman On Twitter Teaches Others How To Set Boundaries

• By Sara Salman
• June 25, 2020
• 3 minutes read

Women are taught to endure uncomfortable environments from a young age.

Girls are given a lot of emotional responsibilities. As a mother, she has to raise her children and make sure they turn out to be good human beings. As a sister and daughter, she is expected to provide emotional support to the family whenever it is needed. When it comes to discrimination between sons and daughters, it starts at an early age. When my brother used to tease or hurt me, my mother would brush it off by saying “He is just a kid” or “Just ignore it.”

If you ask me, that is just a simpler version of saying “It’s easier for you to bare it than for us to teach him better.” So a lot of parents teach their children to tolerate hostile and uncomfortable situations instead of leaving them. This can be very wrong sometimes, as it completely disregards one’s boundaries. We shouldn’t have to put up with difficult situations just so others could be more comfortable.

A woman on Twitter named Erynn Brook shared a story of how her mother taught her to set up her boundaries. I think it is a must-read for everyone! There is very little difference between leaving and quitting, but this thread explains it well. Read it down below:

via: Twitter

So she begins with how her mother explained to her how to set boundaries with others.

It started when she was a little girl and had a plan to go to a sleepover. Her mother assured her that if she felt uncomfortable at any point, she could call her and ask her to pick her up.

So when the other kids at the sleepover teased her about something, Brook decided to leave. The mother of the girl who’s sleepover it was tried to convince her not to go, but Brook was persistent.

Even though the mother of the host constantly apologised, Brook’s mother just calmly said that she has no reason to apologise. Brook can leave whenever she wants and she wasn’t bothering anyone by doing so. There is no obligation for her to be in a place she does not want to be. Now THAT is parenting done right!

Similarly, there were a lot of incidents where Brook just left because she didn’t feel fine in those environments.

So basically, we are taught to swallow our discomfort and not care for our boundaries when we are told to be quiet and not ruin things for others, even if we are in distress.

More mothers need to go with this radical approach instead of just following the norm.

It is okay to leave sometimes. You are allowed to put yourself and your feelings first. Know your boundaries and don’t let anyone break through your comfort zone.

This lesson isn’t just for women. It is for all genders. Practising and putting up boundaries is a human right. No one should be deprived of it.

What did you think of this amazing thread? How have you been brought up? Were you advised to just tolerate others instead of speaking up or leaving? Or were you taught something radical like Brook was? Let us know your thoughts and experiences in the comments below.