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10+ Times Guys Hilariously Missed The Most Unsubtle Hints From Girls And Made Us All Groan

Dropping hints is practically the safest way to get about anything in life. If the person noticed the hint and decided to do something about it, then it’s your lucky day. And, if they choose to ignore it then you just have to assume that they didn’t really pick it up. But desperate times call for desperate measures!

When it comes to dropping hints at guys, they wouldn’t know a girl liked them even if it slapped them in the face! Why are guys so bad at taking a damn hint? Honestly, nobody knows the answer to this. But, most guys are not that observant, so they basically won’t notice anything because they’re just that good at missing the most unsubtle of hints.

 

Here are 10+ times guys hilariously missed the most unsubtle hints from girls and made us all groan:

Via AskReddit

1. Nevermind, he just Googled it.

One time I was texting my bf and told him that I bought a vibrator for the nights he was away at work or something rather. his exact response was, “oh cool, what colour?” I sent him a pic of it and he replied with “can you put it up your butt too?”. I sent him a text replying, “come over and find out” and he replied two minutes later, “nevermind, I just Googled it”

2. How can anyone be this stupid?

Me: so you’re saying, if i like this guy,i should just be straightforward and ask him out?

Him: ya

Me: ok, do you want to go out with me this Friday?

Him: ya, just like that, it was perfect.

Me:…

3. That was meant as a friend’s kiss, right?

My then-not-boyfriend and I were waiting at the train station on my train home; he would leave with the bus after it arrived. My train came and I thought ‘fuck it’ and kissed my then-not-boyfriend on the mouth. Immediately after, I jumped on the train, on which the doors then closed. I didn’t see his reaction nor felt it so I sat pretty anxious on the train, thinking I ruined i tall. About 5 minutes later, I got a text saying:

‘That was meant as a friends kiss, right?’

4. *Cannonballs into a pool of shame*.

Last summer I was doing my best to seduce who is my current boyfriend. We were going swimming at a friend’s house, and while they were changing into their bathing suits in the house, me and him make our way to the pool.

I take advantage of this moment to strip in front of him, as sensual as possible. (Bathing suit was underneath my clothes.)

He runs past me, full sprint, and cannonballs into the pool.

5. He was just being a gentleman

Halloween morning 2014, he knocked on my door to drive me to work. We had been friends for a month and he wouldn’t make a move, so I answered the door in a T-shirt and cat ears and absolutely nothing else; that bastard walked right past me and looked for coffee in the kitchen.

We’ve been married 10 months now ?

He claims he totally knew my intentions but knew being a gentleman would get him farther, I say he’s full of it.

Holy crud-nuggets! This is my top comment ever, thanks internet
strangers!

6. This is a sign!

I was dating a guy who told me upfront that he was terrible at picking up the signs that someone liked him, was flirting, etc. So on our third (?) date, we planned that he would stay the night at my place. I thought that was pretty obvious, but just to make sure, I put a bunch of condoms on a platter on the bed, with notes all around it, pointing to the platter that said “This is a sign!” He thought it was hilarious. We had sex. It was
awesome.

7. Dammit, Matt!

Back in college, my now s/o of 4 years would walk me home from class at night. Mustered up the courage to ask him to “come upstairs and have some wine with me”. Hard no. Ok, he’s not
into it.

Two months later, he invites me and my friends to a party. He’s blackout drunk when we show up, and tells my friend that he’s in love with me and got wasted cuz he was nervous about seeing me. She convinces him to tell me (knowing I was also into him).

Curveball: Told me that he was really into me, but didn’t want to mess up my relationship. Uhrm.. what relationship? Ya know, that guy from our class that you always talk to and giggle with. Uh.. Matt? As in Matt with the boyfriend, Matt? ……..Oh, well that strangely explains a lot.

8. Too good at goodbyes.

I told him he could come home with me after the movie and show me a move we saw during a sex scene. He didn’t go home with me. I don’t think it was because he found me unattractive, but I can’t be sure anymore.

edit: in response to many commenters, the movie was one of the latest James Bond flicks where he sneaks onto the enemy boat and manages to sex up the lady in the shower on the way. I also wouldn’t have dared say something so bold if this wasn’t our fourth date and we’d already progressed to making out during that movie. I thought it was the logical last step, but he just kissed me goodbye.

9. Take me to the other side.

When me and my fiance were in high school we were “best friends”, which of course meant I was too big of a chicken to tell him how I really felt. Well, my move was to always take the seat in front of him and purposely have my thong showing while we had lectures. This went on for all the classes we had together, and we had a lot. I finally had to confess how I felt to him before he left our home town for college after three years of this game. It turns out he was a chicken too. He said those four years were the biggest tease imaginable, it’s hilarious to talk about now.

10. I love Hugo Weaving so much.

*Sighs* So I’ve actually had sex with a girl before realizing she was actually into me.

She knocks on my dorm room door wearing a miniskirt and carrying
a chocolate cake (a whole chocolate cake) and says she just baked it and was
wondering if I’d like to try some. I tell her that I’m not a big fan of
chocolate (crushing her) but was intelligent enough to add that I’d like try it
anyway. We set the cake aside. I invite her in and she asks what I’m up to.

I tell her the truth, that I was about to start watching V for Vendetta, and she squeals that she loves that movie and asks if she can watch it with me. We lay down on my unfolded futon and start watching it together under a blanket (this was in the dead of Boston winter).

We’re watching the movie and she starts making all these comments about Hugo Weaving. “I love Hugo Weaving so much.” “God, Hugo Weaving is so hot.” “Man, Hugo Weaving makes me so horny.” And all this time I’m like “yeah he’s a great actor I loved him in the Matrix”

Maybe 20 minutes pass by and all of a sudden I feel her rubbing up against me and she’s, well, touching herself. “Sorry, I hope you don’t mind, I just got really horny and couldn’t help myself.” And here I am thinking I’m the luckiest dope in the world and I’m so glad I picked a movie that had Hugo Weaving in it. Of course I say something like “oh, uh, that’s OK. I understand. I have actresses that really do that for me, too.” And I do absolutely nothing because I still don’t get that she’s coming onto me.

Another ten minutes of this pass before she just turns to me and asks “Can I suck your dick?”

And my mind– my very underdeveloped pathetic mind– my very
first thoughts were “Hugo Weaving is such a great wingman” and “Damn talk about being in the right place at the right time.” It took me another year before I realized it was all a ruse to get to me and I could have been watching any damn movie at all the whole time with more or less the same result.

11. That’s not what you’re supposed to say.

This girl was sitting with our group of boys and saying “if I was to get with one of you, it would be you [my name]” And I was just like “Ah thanks very much, very kind of you to say that”

12. That escalated sooner than expected.

Hitting on my now boyfriend of three years. I was complimenting him on how handsome he was and how he had beautiful eyes. I wanted a closer view of them so he texted me this creepy ass shot of his eyeball with his eye as widely opened as possible. He legitimately thought that’s what I wanted. After our first date, I immediately started talking about potential future dates and how much fun I had with him. I stayed out so late that I missed my friends party. However, because I didn’t hug him properly and asked to split the cost of the meal, he thought I wasn’t actually interested.

13. Hide and seek.

When my gf and I first started talking she kept leaving hints saying if I wanted to come in for a night cap or if I was too tired to drive, I could stay the night and share the bed. But since I wake up at 4 am for work I told her I was pretty tired and I think I’m gonna go home and it’s not that far of a drive. When I arrived home, i found this link from her

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=xa-4IAR_9Yw

14. How can you not get that?

I was laying down on a bench with my head in his lap talking about our previous /experiences/ (this was high school) and he told me he had never had a bj before. I told him, with my head in his crotch, that I could blow his mind. Nothing. Crickets.

EDIT: we were in a public park and I was a 16 year old with a rapidly approaching curfew. I didn’t expect him to whip it out but I wanted him to have it in mind. I did end up delivering, but not before trying to be coy one last time and being completely straightforward the third time.

15. Nature’s call.

After a conversation with my boyfriend about not being obvious enough when trying to initiate sex, I decided to entice him by posing naked on the corner of the bed and seductively whispering “Hey, you” as he walked in the room.

His reaction? He walks in the room, gives me a bro nod, and
says, “Hey, babe! I gotta poop.”

We did NOT end up having sex that night.

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