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The women of Twitter never cease to amuse us with their well crafted, funny Tweets. Some of them are perfect examples of intelligence meeting good humour. It’s incredible how they manage to put up the sarcasm and infotainment in such a short lived character limit. People at Huffpost have a weekly ritual to scour the Twitterverse and round up 140-character musings. We have the honour to share some of the best examples of this week’s collection with you. We hope that it would be a nice dosage for your leisure time amusement. Enjoy 🙂
pro tip: never check your bank account at 8 a.m. after a long weekend without first drinking coffee
— Jen Doll (@thisisjendoll) May 30, 2017
DATING TIP: When you open a hot oven and get really close it feels like a hug without having to touch anyone
— Charlene deGuzman (@charstarlene) May 31, 2017
cut the shit, I'm not grinding up cauliflower to make a healthy bagel bite, I will see you in hell first. bagel hell
— audrey farnsworth (@audipenny) May 30, 2017
cut the shit, I'm not grinding up cauliflower to make a healthy bagel bite, I will see you in hell first. bagel hell
— audrey farnsworth (@audipenny) May 30, 2017
"what we gettin into tonight 😈" – me to my bed at 9:21 PM
— no (@jodecicry) May 30, 2017
My boyfriend made brown sugar candied bacon which is the food form of dangerous and unbridled desire
— sighorny beaver (@merrydevo) May 30, 2017
'you can't cut people off your life over political opinions'
me: pic.twitter.com/OF2ngnfAbi
— antifa // acab // blm (@bilrac) May 30, 2017
I want to watch video of every time I'm talking on my phone and simultaneously looking for my phone.
— kelly oxford (@kellyoxford) May 31, 2017
what if i had a dating show called 'who wants to date trace' and the theme song was those words to the tune of 'who let the dogs out'
— tracy clayton aka CHUBBA BEEF (@brokeymcpoverty) May 31, 2017
what if i had a dating show called 'who wants to date trace' and the theme song was those words to the tune of 'who let the dogs out'
— tracy clayton aka CHUBBA BEEF (@brokeymcpoverty) May 31, 2017
When I put in a new tampon and five minutes later think, "but did I take out my old tampon?" pic.twitter.com/8gMeZspIvn
— Anna Kendrick (@AnnaKendrick47) May 27, 2017
for those of you mad about a female-only showing of "Wonder Woman," remember that for 100s of years you got male-only showings of "voting"
— Megan Amram (@meganamram) May 30, 2017
https://twitter.com/kashanacauley/status/868625456941105153
me: how old is your baby?
her: 46 weeks
me, struggling w/the math: may i offer him a beer?— Erica (@SCbchbum) June 1, 2017
Trump calls his investigation a witch hunt. Witch, please. pic.twitter.com/0NFBuQhRvm
— bettemidler (@BetteMidler) June 1, 2017
It's all fun and games until you have to catch up on email
— Brit Bennett (@britrbennett) May 30, 2017
https://twitter.com/jessmisener/status/870347790882189312
https://twitter.com/Monicann86/status/870662912163012610
https://twitter.com/heavenrants/status/869788956270964736
It's crazy how far my high school boyfriend went to make me jealous- ignored me for 15 yrs & is now married with a kid. He's not fooling me.
— beth, uprising enthusiast (@bourgeoisalien) May 27, 2017
Maybe if we start calling it Unborn Baby Earth instead of Mother Earth republicans will be more concerned with its well-being.
— The Volatile Mermaid (@OhNoSheTwitnt) June 2, 2017
