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‘Felines Of New York’ Is A Hilarious Parody Page With Cats Where You Can Find All The Wise Cats

  • By Asad Tipu
  • December 27, 2017
  • 3 minutes read

Cats are awesome.

They make up a large chunk of the internet and are one of the most watched creatures on the planet. These cute and cuddly animals are everywhere, be it Youtube, Facebook, Tumblr, or even Twitter.

A new social media page called Felines of New York made by Jim Tews is a parody of the famous Humans Of New York, and the posts are absolutely goddamn hilarious.

#1 Maddie, Financial District.

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“I try to live in the present, but it’s hard. Sometimes you wonder, what’s retirement going to be like? What can I do now to make sure I’m able to live like this when I’m old? When I start worrying about stuff like that, I just think ‘You’ve made it this far with your wits and looks, just trust.’ Then I begin a rigorous, lengthy self-grooming session in the middle of the living room.”

– Maddie, Financial District

#2 Michelle, Harlem

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“I was a mess in my early twenties. I spent a lot of time in places I didn’t belong, with other cats who were no good for me. Picking the scraps off of fishbones on a garbage can lid. That was my rock bottom.”

– Michelle, Harlem

#3 Jooney, Harlem

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“We’re really taking the time to figure each other out, and it’s going great. We realized, ultimately, we both want the same thing.”

“What’s that?”

“People food.”

– Jooney, Harlem

#4 Auron

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“I was crazy in love with this Blue Russian for a while, but she had to end it. Her family was moving back to the midwest. I don’t know where that is, but if this window ever opens, I’m going to find it.”

– Auron

#5 Bella

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“I can name all fifty states.”

“Wow! Seriously?”

“No.”

– Bella
(Visit Bella at the Meow Parlour, and adopt her!)

#6 Orange, Park Slope

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“I decided a long time ago that I don’t want kittens. A lot of other cats judge me for it, but kittens would just get in the way of my career.”

“What career is that?”

“I’m in the walking around and laying on stuff business. It’s insanely competitive.”

– Orange, Park Slope

 

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