10 Things I Want My Niece To Know When Shit Gets Real

Right now, my niece is a barely a month old, and all she cares about is drinking milk and sleeping. She is unaware of the world that is laid out in front of her. Heck, she doesn’t even know my name, but we all know how time passes us by.

She does not care about stuff like guys or her body image, but without even realizing it, she soon will care and worry about such things just like I do now.

So when she reaches these years, I want her to know these things:


1. Don’t be Afraid to Say “Fuck Off.”

Okay so that might sound a bit rude, but I do not mean it in a literal way. We might think to be nice means to accept the whims of our friends and requests of adults even though we don’t want to, at least I do that a lot.

This little characteristic of mine has gotten me into a lot of trouble over the years as I learned to say no a lot later than I should have. So that’s why I want you not to be afraid to say “Fuck Off”. You could say it however you like; with your eyes, your actions, by walking away or even saying it. Doesn’t matter as long as you say it.

2. Able to Distinguish Between Lust and Love

So this is a hard one, as it is sometimes impossible to know whether the other person values you or just lusts after you. They may even desire you so much that you almost start to believe that they love you but these two are very different things. There is no harm done if you know the other person doesn’t love you, but you still kiss or sleep with him as long as you both accept this arrangement.

3. Treat Yourself

You might think that buying those gorgeous shoes, eating that delicious chocolate or using your savings on a day in a spa alone makes you selfish. Let me tell you something; it doesn’t.

We all deserve a little me time, so it is perfectly fine to be a little selfish sometimes.

4. Forget About the Thigh Gap

Worrying about our body image every second of the day, that’s why I want to tell you to not worry about these insignificant things.

Be happy with yourself. Eat right and eat what makes you happy. So if pizza makes you happy find a way to make it healthy or just indulge in its cheesy goodness once in a while. Treat your body right, and you will never have to worry about the thigh gap or whatever the new trend.

5. Let It Go

Yes, I am very aware of the overused song lyric, but I mean it. If you don’t like how your makeup looks, wipe it off and let it go. If your friend is disrespecting you, rather than trying to make her understand, let her go.

Don’t fake something just to make others happy or accept you. If a person doesn’t know your value just let them go.

6. Vulnerability is Not a Weakness.

Everyone has had their heart broken. Its just how life is, but rather than bottling up all of these feelings just because you think it makes you weak, let them all out.

If someone broke your heart, tell them and lay it all out. Then walk away. Don’t pester them as they already heard what you said. Move on.

Confide in your friends. Tell me about it. If they cared about you, they wouldn’t have hurt you in the first place.

7. Don’t Rush into Things

Sometimes we rush into things because we believe we are making the right choice, and maybe we are at the time, but it might come back to bite us later. Like getting that beautiful butterfly tattoo, then regretting it six months later.

So don’t make important decisions on a whim like marriage, career or your friends. Think about these things before committing.

8. You are Awesome.

Yes, am being a bit biased, but I mean it. You are unique and awesome in your own right so don’t let anyone tell you anything other than that.

If you wait for other people to validate you, then you won’t be able to live your life how you want. I will always believe in you. You just have to believe in yourself.

9. Accept Your Weaknesses

Everyone has strengths and weaknesses as not one person in this world is perfect so rather than comparing yourself to someone and then feeling bad about yourself.

Accept that maybe this is a weakness of yours, so try to make it a strength or take it and move on.

10. Don’t be Hard on Yourself.

You might get frustrated when not being able to do something, but don’t be so hard on yourself. You might think that pushing yourself hard enough might make you better, but as I said before; Accept yourself as you are, instead of trying to be someone else.

 There will be moments in your life when you want to give up but don’t. Keep moving, and you will reach your goal. If you fall, get up, wipe away the dust and be happy with yourself.

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